


A Walk in the Park

by jawnlovessherlock



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Angst, Kisses, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-15
Updated: 2014-08-15
Packaged: 2018-02-13 07:32:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2142471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jawnlovessherlock/pseuds/jawnlovessherlock
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock and John get into a big fight which results in John leaving 221b. The two attempt to express their feelings for each other resulting in catastrophe.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Sherlock felt something cold press against his temple.

"You shouldn't have come here Mr. Holmes."

The clicking of the gun being loaded echoed in the warehouse.

"Wait-" Sherlock protested.

Pain exploded in the right sound of his face where the pistol had made contact with it.

_How had he not expected that?_

Dazed from the pistol whip he struggled to get up as the sound of a gun shot ripped through the air. He heard the muffled sound of a body hit the cement and then quick, echoing footsteps.

John's face, panic stricken, appeared in front of him, "Are you okay?"

Sherlock quickly gained his composure and replied, "Yeah, of course I am. We should leave before the police arrive."

Nothing was said on the way to 221b but as soon as John shut the door the silence was broken.

"I told you that you shouldn't have gone alone Sherlock!" John attempted to remain calm but Sherlock could here the anger in his voice.

"I would have been fine without you John" Sherlock responded as he scrolled through his messages from Lestrade.

"He was about to fucking shoot you Sherlock! Are you so conceited that you think you can block bullets now?"

"I had it figured out John!" now they were both shouting.

"Yeah I suppose that getting pistol whipped was part of the plan, right?"

"I was going to figure it out, I didn't need you!"

_I needed you._

"You don't even care! YOU MACHINE! If you get hurt it will affect other people, Sherlock!"

_He cares._

"I'm not going to get hurt John, why would you care anyways?"

"I care becau- Oh, go to hell Sherlock!" John grabbed his coat and slammed the door behind him.

After Sherlock heard the outside door slam, he screamed in frustration and flipped the coffee table.

_Why did he have to be so stupid?_

He kicked the table a couple times towards the wall and retreated to his room for the night.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Two days later.** _

Sherlock wandered into John's room to see if he had come home. He immediately noticed his top dresser drawer was open, empty.

_He left. It's your fault._

He walked over to John's bed and threw himself onto it. He buried his face into John's sheets trying to memorize his smell.

Sherlock left John's room what seemed like hours later and sat in his chair, laying his face in his hands. He heard keys jingling outside the flat door and looked up hopefully. John stood in the doorway, mouth agape.

_He wasn't expecting me to be here._

"I just need to get more clothes, Sherlock." muttered John.

"Where have you been?"

"I've been staying with someone else, you don't know her."

_Her._

Sherlock made to stand up but quickly sat back down at the look John gave him.

"What?" John responded, annoyed.

"Nothing..." Sherlock trailed off as he sat back down.

"Yeah, I didn't think you would care." he didn't sound angry, just disappointed, which hurt Sherlock even more.

_Tell him._

"John-" but John had left, leaving only guilt and pain for Sherlock.


	3. Chapter 3

_**One day later**_

Sherlock hadn't heard John outside the flat and quickly put his tea down to go out to meet him. He had made up his mind about what he wan't to do. He couldn't bear to lose John.

"Sherlock I want to ta-"

Sherlock had crossed the room in two quick strides and kissed John mid sentence. He had expected John to protest after all he  _wasn't gay_  but his mouth seemed to disagree. Sherlock moved his hands under John's jumper and then slowly below the waistband of his pants. His fingertips brushed John's cock as he pushed John against the wall. He felt John's growing erection against his own and fumbled with the zipper on John's pants. Very abruptly John pushed him away. His wide eyes darted around the flat like a scared animal. Muttering to himself, he scampered out of the flat.

The sound of Sherlock Holmes' heart breaking for what seemed like the hundredth time could be heard a mile away and John just couldn't seem to hear it.

At the sound of the outside door closing Sherlock picked up the nearest thing to him, which turned out to be a mug, and hurled it at the wall.

_Stop kidding yourself. Stop kidding yourself. Why would he love you?_

"Sherlock Holmes! What is going on up there?" yelled Mrs. Hudson.

Sherlock kicked the remnants of the mug John had given him out of the way as he trudged back to his bedroom, leaving his broken heart among the shards of broken glass.


	4. Chapter 4

_**2 days later.** _

Sherlock lay, strewn across the couch, still in his pajamas when the door opened. He quickly sat up and saw John standing in the doorway.

"Sherlock, we need to talk about what happened."

"What ha-"

"Don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about."

Sherlock nodded his head in consent.

"Why?" John's tone sounded almost hopeful.

_Tell him._ _No. He doesn't feel the same way._

"I-it was an experiment."

"What?" disbelief etched into John's face.

"An experiment."

Hurt, John responded angrily, "What was the result of this  _experiment?"_

"Inconclusive." Sherlock muttered.

"You cock! You don't care who you hurt! In fact, you tend to hurt those who care about you the most! You get off on playing with people's feelings!" John whipped around and grabbed the door preparing to slam it, "Next time you feel the urge to experiment, don't call me!" the echo of the door slamming lasted for only a second but the ringing in Sherlock's ears never seemed to leave.

Angry and frustrated by himself, picked up another mug and lobbed it at the wall. The remains of the mug mixed with the shards of the first broken mug.

_He's never coming back. It's all your fault. It always will be._


	5. Chapter 5

  _ **One week later.**_

The days had gone by very slowly without John. It felt like he hadn't seen him in months when in reality, it had only been a week. It seemed like an eternity. He needed something to distract him.

_Maybe Lestrade has a case._

Sherlock had been very irritable lately and he knew Lestrade was worried. He picked up his phone and dialed Lestrade's number.

"Hi, Sherlock." Lestrade had picked up after the first ring.

_Eager to talk to you._

"Lestrade do you have a case that Scotland Yard is incapable of solving?"

"um, a body was found at Hyde park this morning."

"I'll meet you there in ten minutes."

Sherlock hung up before Lestrade could inquire how he was doing. How he was doing without John.

He arrived at Hyde Park, where a body had been found this morning. Presumably, hidden there the night before. He spotted Lestrade pacing on a pathway, waiting for Sherlock.

"Where's the body?" Sherlock asked Greg with a tone of annoyance in his voice.

Greg gave him a puzzled and concerned look, "Under the tree, I'll give you some time to look at it along".

After giving Lestrade enough information that even an idiot could solve the crime he turned to leave.

"How long have you loved him? John, Sherlock." he added noticing the mock look of confusion on Sherlock's face.

Sherlock, his back to Greg, decided on the truth, for once.

"It has been coming on so gradually, that I hardly know when it began." he didn't bother waiting for a response, he took big strides trying to quickly distance himself from Lestrade and his confession.

As he emerged from a wooded path he froze in dismay at the figure seated on the bench 20 feet away.

_John._ _Did Greg call him? Probably._

All he wanted to do was approach him.

_No. Why would he want to see you?_

He found himself being drawn to John, his feet moving even though he didn't want to.

"John" his voice cracked as he whispered his name.

_Stop walking toward him.You can still turn away, he didn't hear you._

But he couldn't, he needed, he craved to talk to John again, to be with him. To set things right.

"John" his voice cracked again.

John jumped at the sound of Sherlock's voice and whipped his head around to see him. He had to force himself to keep eye contact with John.

_Turn around. Run._

"Sh-"

"It wasn't for an experiment John," he gulped and lowered his gaze to John's shoes as he sat down on the bench, "I didn't mean to hurt you, I never wanted to hurt you."

"Then why?"

"I- I- I love you Well I'm pretty sure I love you. I've never felt this way about- well, anyone before. So yes, I love you."

Sherlock felt his cheeks grow hot with embarrassment.

John's eyes widened with shock at his last statement as if he could never expect such emotion from him. He placed his left hand under Sherlock's chin and lifted his head up to make eye contact. Then, a small, unexpected smile spread across his face, "I love you too... I was just scared."

_He loves me?_

John put one hand on the side of Sherlock's face and the other in his dark curls yanking him towards him. Sherlock's eyes widened as John's lips connected with his. He made an agonized sound and brought his hands up to hold John's face, his phone clattering loudly onto the bench. John jumped at the noise but Sherlock didn't move, yanking on the turned up collar of his jacket to draw him closer as he slanted his lips against John’s. He felt his heart beat quicken as John's mouth parted pushing his tongue through Sherlock's teeth.

_I missed you so much._

He took in John's smell, his taste, as if for the first time.

_Please don't leave me again._

A groan escaped John's lips and Sherlock pulled him closer, afraid of loosing him.

"Why don't we head back to the flat?" John whispered in Sherlock's ear.

Sherlock nodded and grabbed John's hand leading him home.


End file.
